Remember those Carl’s Jr. commercials where Paris Hilton would seduce a juicy burger on her knees…being completely promiscuous towards a beef patty. My question is…was Paris enhancing the juicy burger…or was the beefy patty making her look sexy? I think a burger always looks pretty enticing…but sometimes an average girl needs to get chin deep in a whopper to make her sexy. Either way it was pretty hot. Lets compare sex and food because I think they are two things that are controlling most of our thoughts on a daily basis.
I probably started writing about this topic because of tonight’s instance at the gym. I lazily waited till about 8:30 p.m. to go workout. Clearly knowing that the gym closes at 10 p.m. I find myself trying to avoid the gym and waiting till later and later in the day. Especially on my days off. I am going to try and turn away from this bad habit. If I were to make an excuse it would be because I have been working a lot of morning shifts lately and when I get home from work I am completely exhausted. But NO excuses, remember. However, I did some circuit training tonight and was ready to leave after 40 minutes. I knew subconsciously this was not sufficient and fought on. As I’m fighting to keep focused…I see a girl at the counter taking her baggy, way over sized sweatshirt off. Underneath was nothing I would’ve pictured. A skinny girl with curves and very firm stomach and fit body. Way to come incognito. Fooled me.
I can honestly say that this was the first time I felt like a gym stalker….and if it wasn’t, I don’t remember doing it before. But I had to get the full picture. In LA you see way too many 50-yard fake outs, butter faces, and girls that make everything look good by wearing clothes 2 sizes too small. Don’t worry we know the tight jean trick. The truth comes out once they come off. I want to say “thank you” Asian girl in the pink sports bra and gray pants. I ended up working out for an hour and half. Definitely not expected, but I could never get a good enough view. Once I did…it was over. Body Karate!!! Even when she was on a machine…not the slightest bit of tummy roll. How is this possible? I don’t know what does it for you…but the hottest thing on a girl for me is the butt dimples. Let’s put it into food terms since that’s what this post is essentially supposed to be about. A girl with an amazing body is a burger…medium rare, smoked Gouda cheese, caramelized onions, on a brioche bun. You throw in butt dimples and it’s a Kobe burger with the addition of an over easy egg, bacon, and avocado. Enough said. If I had to critique one thing about this walking Picasso…it was that she was a tad skinny. Which made me think…would it be better to have a girl that was a little bit skinny…that way when she puts on 5 lbs. and thinks she’s getting fat, you think she’s perfect. I don’t know about you, but I convinced myself.
Food porn is the enhancing of foods and showcasing them as if they were Victoria Secret Angels strutting down the runway. Why do we need to entice people with food this way? It’s pretty brilliant. I’ve been fortunate enough to go behind the scenes and actually see how they put food in magazines. I staged side-by-side with a food and prop stylist to see what they do to make food look so wanting. You would be amazed by all the little tricks to make things gleam, look juice, give volume, and to keep fresh. You know how the lettuce on burgers have those few droplets of water…to make it look that much fresher and appealing. Obviously women do this too with enhancing themselves with makeup and accessorizing their greatest attributes.
Question…Would you rather give up sex for a month or your favorite food/snack? What would be harder to go without? I’m not going to answer it, but if you analyze it…after eating an amazing meal you are completely satisfied and want to sit on a couch and soak in the amazing calories you consumed. On the opposite end when you have an amazing sexual encounter…the better it is, the more you want and sleep/rest isn’t a priority anymore. I guess I did answer it…in my eyes burning calories is always better than consuming them.
estonerealist 